Principle #18: Be Sympathetic With The Other Person’s Ideas And Desires

Stephen Grellet, a prominent French-born American Quaker missionary, epitomizes the reasons for this Dale Carnegie principle with his statement, “I expect to pass through this world but once. Any good that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to my fellow man, let me do it now. Let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again.”

This principle says put yourself in the other person’s shoes and see the situation from their perspective. Too often with our employees we are unwilling to see the situation from their perspective because as leaders we want the work done in the way we expect and completed when we expect it.

Example: Suzy came to me with her ideas on a project she was working. She presented evidence that supported her ideas on the project. I could have easily said no I want you to do it my way. Instead I listened to her ideas and allowed her to complete the project in the way she wanted.

What was the result? The project was a complete failure. However, Suzy worked double-time to fix it and she now has the confidence to bring forward her ideas and desires.  I was able to build an environment that allowed employees to bring forth their ideas without fear if they failed. Steve Jobs set the standard for this approach and look how successful Apple was under his leadership.

(By Dale Carnegie *1888-1955* founder of the Carnegie Course)

Download Dale Carnegie’s Golden Book for access to the entire list of Human Relations Principles

Posted by Mary Kuniski

Mary Kuniski is passionate about the Dale Carnegie principles delivered over 100 years ago and continues to experience success today by employing those ageless ideologies. Ms. Kuniski is a Dale Carnegie graduate of 2010 and since that time has coached four programs. She has over 35 years of management experience and has held an Executive level position for the past 20 years. Currently, Ms. Kuniski is the Director of Master Data Management at Overhead Door Corporation, a position she has assumed in June 2015. She spent the past 19 years employed by Michaels Stores, Inc as a Vice President of Vendor Management, where she managed supply chain optimization and quality assurance for the company. She oversaw a multi-million dollar budget and drove operational excellence for domestic and international vendor community of 800+ vendors resulting in a 99.84% shipment accuracy ratio. Over the course of her career with Michaels, Ms. Kuniski also held the responsibilities for Vendor and Facilities Management, Store Communication and Store Management. Ms. Kuniski received a Bachelor of Science degree in Fashion Merchandising from Penn State University and a Master of Business Administration from the University of Phoenix.

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